Charles Ramsey sets an Emotional Intelligence example
It hasn’t been easy watching crime rates rise or weathering horrors such as mass shootings in very public places such as schools, movie theatres and alike. Coping with the headlines about bombings, murder and kidnapping isn’t settling for anyone. Maybe the hardest part about coping is the feeling of helplessness, or not knowing how to be the change-maker of these headlines for the better. While it won’t magically transform anyone into superman, developing stronger emotional intelligence at home and at work can help society begin to prevent and detect more of these occurrences.
One recent headline that has been cause for appreciation is Charles Ramsey “I’m no hero in freeing captive women”. While Ramsey’s rescue of three captive women and a young girl is uplifting, no doubt the story resurfaces questions like “How did the suspect (Ariel Castro) get away with kidnapping, holding hostage and assaulting three women for nearly a decade?”
Charles Ramsey (left) with Anderson Cooper – Photo Credit: CNN
In truth, it is unlikely that people who knew Castro (or his brothers also suspected of involvement) may have sensed that something was wrong. Castro, similar to anyone else, worked and according to reports, was even social within his neighborhood. However, while he was having face time with the people in his life, was he truly stealthy to conceal his nature, or were people too closed off to venture on to discover the truth? At work or anywhere else one goes, it is possible to encounter someone like Castro. But in environments like work, individuals can but seldom do get to know one another.
This trail of consideration might lead someone to wonder if anyone did in fact suspect him of anything sooner. At times like this, the inquisitive speculation process could help draw some potential answers. Castro was fired from his job as a school bus driver a year ago. There was an incident where he left the school bus unattended for four hours. Of course, that is not typical employee behavior. Is it possible someone he worked with did sense something was awry which led to his termination? The challenging aspect of emotional intelligence, is managing emotions (the action part). If someone felt Castro was displaying concerning behavior, reporting the situation would have been the next best action. The issue is that even when people begin to develop their emotional intelligence, they are sometimes afraid of what they find in others. In response, instead of managing the situation in the best way possible, they take the easy route. In this situation, if Castro was indeed fired due to some form of suspicious activity, firing him was the easy way out, instead of further investigation and reporting the concern.
It is difficult to soak in this kind of reality check. If anything, rising violence causes society to want to be less empathetic. People want to stick to their “circles of trust” and own groups. Individuals are afraid of reaching out to get to know others. Past that, even when they are suspicious of behavior displayed by others, it is road less-traveled to not simply isolate that individual. In fact, it is this isolation, which could be attributed to creating the viscous cycle. Lack of inspiration and being insular can cause the continuum to hurt themselves and others. Well, Ramsey would see that this came to a halt. True he was struck by lightening, but what he did with that flash is what led to the turn of events.
The good news is that above all else, Ramsey’s rescue story has reminded people that it is good to be attentive at times. Safe can be sorry too. Balancing safe with alertness is positive. He took action when he knew he was placing himself in mortal danger. The ability to overcome the natural instinct for self-preservation to help others is a superior display of emotional intelligence. If people could look into their core to cling to their “hero” persona on a daily bases by simply becoming more emotionally intelligent, society would likely benefit a big way.
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